a friend rant down there. beware because confusion spilled all over it.

Damn. did i seem busy?

Am i that unapproachable? To the two best friends I thought i could count on and trust. It seems really stupid worrying about two friends hanging out without you, but i mean maybe it just began as a scandal. I agree, me and one of them had our rough times, but to take a friend like that and just KNOW that she’d feel bad if that happened to her is pretty stupid. 

Why can’t i have the life of other’s who’s best friends are always by their side? I seem to be the only unhappy person to just not see anything positively, or bright anymore. i feel lonely. and a pep talk or any talk would not be able to make me feel better. I’m scared. Afraid of dying which gets me so mad. because if i weren’t i’m sure i wouldn’t be here typing anymore. I feel like i lost everything.

Or maybe just realized that i never had anything to begin with. It’s okay. Because i’m moving on. I have to move on, because wanting to or not, moving on will happen natheless. 

“Why can’t i have something in my life that’s special, that means something?” (Glee)